Don't Say Never

I thought I'd never go on a Senior outing and eat a meal selected beforehand--and then herded into an "activity". And yet I went, ate a hearty meal at The Cheesecake Factory and took a seventy minute cruise up or down the Charles River. And I found it enjoyable--laughed, wrote a poem about the experience, and rode the van back home. 

Today Mattress Firm in Acton delivered a mattress. Actually it was their second delivery. The first mattress was so low that it felt as if I was sleeping on the floor. This one is a bit high and requires a toe push to get on--nothing is ever perfect. I guess I needed something between the two sizes. Better to be a bit higher than brushing the floor. Perhaps one day I'll require a step stool--or a running start to get in bed. The trick--not to cause a cataclysmic shift in the mattress disturbing Dorothy's sleep.

Everything is a learning curve.

A New Beginning

A New Beginning

    There are all manner of beginnings. Every new beginning has a starting point out of which everything that comes after flows. After ten years of living in a single family house we moved to a "retirement" community. Camillia Gardens is located in Maynard--only a mile away from the house, but for all purposes miles away. Here we are in a spacious two bedroom apartment--with less space, a hallway outside, meals that are shared with others--a kitchen that really isn't save for our appliances, although there is an apartment sized fridge--quite adequate. The washing machine and dryer are down the hall--shared by all. Getting to know people is both exciting and fraught with issues--some folks you immediately take a liking to, others you are polite to, but have no connection. And , of course, people have been here for years and have made connections. 

Meals are where you meet people--yet some folks have set up tables and eat with the same people for meals. Sort of like a middle school dynamic. Perhaps the thing is to align oneself with the new people.   

This evening we attempted to put away the last of what is on the floor in the den--and I had to figure out how to get on our secure network. Which, I think, I did.

A Different Vacation

 This is a different summer holiday. At the last moment we cancelled Acadia--something about traveling six hours on the highway going 70 miles an hour at our ages. It's hard to accept that age.

  Later on in the week we'll be heading down to the MFA to see a Salvador Dali exhibit, Instead of driving we'll take an Uber ride. By the time you pay for parking or the T down it's almost a wash.  We discovered this when David was visiting and we caught an uber from place to place. During David's visit we discovered walking sticks, ON sneakers, Mont Blanc pens, and soft zippered shirts. 

Yesterday we went down to Porter Square Bookstore--which is moving to the old Sears Building in Porter Square--more room. And the coffee shop will expand its size. I hope it retains its vibe and doesn't look like a refigured Barnes and Nobel. 

We're both on a Preston & Charles reading kick. Laid back summer read--and they have series. 

We're heading there today after stopping in Harvard at the General Store for lunch. Great lunch.   

A New Car--June 2024

 June 30, 2024

I sold all my photo equipment and purchased Fuji equipment; however, the Fuji camera is backordered and B & H has no idea when the camera will be available. I guess I'll be relying on my phone for photos. I just called and spoke to someone who said that even Fuji has no idea. Fuji anticipated that 15,000 people would sign up for the new camera--500,000 signed up. To say that they are overwhelmed is an understatement.

Jori contacted us and she and her girlfriend will spend two days with us at the beginning of August1.  It would be nice if Cousins lobster truck is around--if not we can order in lobsters. Possibly the weather will be pleasant enough to sit outside. I did notice that the bottom of the umbrella stand has rust--as well as the bottom of the large umbrella. And the umbrella is a variegated blue from the folds 

David and Peggy took Zara to a rehab center in San Diego that specializes in treating young women with eating disorders. It's a thirty day rehab program.  Zara is anxious to go--at least that's what she is telling Dave and Peg. 

We purchased a new car--a "radiant red" Honda. (Our old Subaru was thirteen years old). I still need to get used to the seats. There's not car made that is totally comfortable for my left leg. The trick is to contrive a position that does the least damage. I probably should not spend too much time reading in the car. Dorothy is outside attempting to program all the gadgets. She just told me that she can't figure out Google Maps. We have to go back to Honda to get the registration papers and they can help us with navigating the intricacies of Google maps. Life was easier without all these electronic gizmos'  

ELUL DAY 4

 Words

When will I choose

 to hold my words

 before unleashing them—

 letting them roam

 unfettered , settling in crevices

left by silence

while I struggle

to stuff them into before

AUGUST 21, 2023

PROMPT: CHOOSE

Elul Day 1.  Decide

 Leaves turned the seasons 

Calendars flipped through decades

And I thought of telling my story

From the day she kissed me in my kitchen

From the time she kicked me in the shin

when I said I could not walk in the snow

For years she wrote of Jesus, of saving grace

of praying for forgiveness

Later on she moved to a mountain 

where she created an enclave for her family

We parted and she said we could talk 

but never about that time when she sinned

She and I wrote once or twice a year

0f this and that, small things

Sometimes books but in time she only read

tomes on Jesus, of people who followed

and people who led missions to places

where worship had a different lexicon

Whenever I began to tell of my life

she changed the subject

When did I decide to write a letter

telling her about my relationship

of over forty years

years of joy

I sent the letter

Her son wrote to me saying she had died

before she read the letter

He read the letter

 

Return

 I know that I have been absent for a year, but it is Elul once again and I’ve decided to return. Starting tomorrow I’ll post an Elul poem or prose piece. 

I Want to Tell About Me

I am the last person to know

who did what to whom

or whose marriage tilts 

toward divorce or who has a 

lover they meet once a week

I bring nothing in return for

snippets of gossip

I don’t carry juicy tidbits 

to add to a conversation 

Adonai, look into my heart

eavesdrop on my words

I try to follow You with words

and actions not sullied by 

those who flaunt your 

blueprint for life

I want to sing of your love

I want to praise the grandeur

of creation

Adonai, enfold me in your arms

Let me worship in your house

Don’t lump me with those who

choose a path led by charlatans 

Adonai, look my way

Don’t test my loyalty

Cover me with your grace

wrap me with your garments

I can’t promise to never veer

but each day I shall wait on You

And if I fall I will get up

and look your way

gather myself 

and walk toward You

I will call your name

Adonai 

Day Five Elul

Prompt : Want

Commit

                                                                  

                                                               To Commit

                                                                               I have found the one

                                                                            whom my soul loves——Song of  Solomon 3:4

                                                       I complete myself

                                                 My wild and adventuresome 

                                                 soulmate, my love

                                                                  ——Song of Solomon 3:4

Elul: Day Four

Prompt: Commit

Choose

What to read? 

Perhaps a Queer romance? Or

biblical commentary unveiling

truth as seen by the author

 or a memoir that upends a simple life—

writing of conflict and a sink

of dirty dishes, silverware 

with meal remnants, wine glasses

with a ring of residue

What to read ?

Shall I dip into a book outlining

forgiveness? A how-to for those

who need a road map.

and a reminder for others

What to read?

Day Four Elul

Prompt: Choose

When Stories Grow

Prepare Me

to look inside myself

before I tread beyond my marrow

Let me enter the place where my stories take root

Let me rub each word to erase any magnification

to cleanse away the dressing-up of truth

so the tale is not enlarged 

or clothed in new garments

only then I will look beyond myself 

Day 3 Three Elul

Prompt: Prepare

Finding the Holy Each Day

                                We have what we seek, it is there all the time, 

                                    and if we give it time, it will make itself known to us.—

                                        ——Thomas Merton

  

When dark settles between tree limbs

When sounds interrupt quiet

I wait

I wait to hear a voice break through—

shatter silence

I enter prayer, speak to one

 who hides His face

who  waits for me

to speak 

Hashem I say

Prompt Word: Seek

A Riff on Psalm 25

                                                                              I don’t want other people to decide who I am.

                                                                            I want to decide that for myself.——Emma Watson

So many ask why?

Why believe in one

whose face is hidden

beneath words

I chant Your praise,

off-key and with a stutter 

of Hebrew syllables 

You hear my soul song

My praise

I stand wrapped in a cocoon

of cloth offering praise

I am not ashamed

of my song

You uncover sounds

beneath the depth of

my words, filling spaces

I chant my praise

Let others

follow false idols

messiahs of wealth

I will praise You

without shame

Day 1 Elul

Prompt : Decide

GODTIME

 

                               So I call on your name

                               knowing you will answer

                                                       Fisher

GOD TIME

You

Me

We talk

First you

Then me

I ask you how you doing

And you tell me about how you got a traffic ticket

I ask if you can get it fixed

You answer about your uncle joe

who  knows someone 

in the precinct

near Katz’s delicatessen 

named  Bernie

He’s always got some cow blood

on his apron

I ask you

about your bunions 

and if you cut a hole in your sneaker like I told you’

it don’t hurt so much

You’re a mensch

Not like God

Too busy to answer when I ask

Four years ago I asked a Butch

For my  cousin’s daughter Zipporah

The one who has acne

Did God answer

Not yet

God takes Godtime

Could be years

until  God gets to your letter

Maybe God’s doing a needlepoint

for God’s favorite angel

A guy with a name twisted like a pretzel

You

Me

We know about time

 LIFE’S LIKE THE GRAND OLE’ OPERA

because my tulips dig their way 

out of winter’s hard packed snow

because every wave 

was born in the Arctic Ocean

because every artist feels colors 

i their souls

because this second is pushed

aside by another on its way

because loving like i was twenty

Linda Watskin