ELUL DAY 4

 Words

When will I choose

 to hold my words

 before unleashing them—

 letting them roam

 unfettered , settling in crevices

left by silence

while I struggle

to stuff them into before

AUGUST 21, 2023

PROMPT: CHOOSE

Elul Day 1.  Decide

 Leaves turned the seasons 

Calendars flipped through decades

And I thought of telling my story

From the day she kissed me in my kitchen

From the time she kicked me in the shin

when I said I could not walk in the snow

For years she wrote of Jesus, of saving grace

of praying for forgiveness

Later on she moved to a mountain 

where she created an enclave for her family

We parted and she said we could talk 

but never about that time when she sinned

She and I wrote once or twice a year

0f this and that, small things

Sometimes books but in time she only read

tomes on Jesus, of people who followed

and people who led missions to places

where worship had a different lexicon

Whenever I began to tell of my life

she changed the subject

When did I decide to write a letter

telling her about my relationship

of over forty years

years of joy

I sent the letter

Her son wrote to me saying she had died

before she read the letter

He read the letter

 

Return

 I know that I have been absent for a year, but it is Elul once again and I’ve decided to return. Starting tomorrow I’ll post an Elul poem or prose piece. 

I Want to Tell About Me

I am the last person to know

who did what to whom

or whose marriage tilts 

toward divorce or who has a 

lover they meet once a week

I bring nothing in return for

snippets of gossip

I don’t carry juicy tidbits 

to add to a conversation 

Adonai, look into my heart

eavesdrop on my words

I try to follow You with words

and actions not sullied by 

those who flaunt your 

blueprint for life

I want to sing of your love

I want to praise the grandeur

of creation

Adonai, enfold me in your arms

Let me worship in your house

Don’t lump me with those who

choose a path led by charlatans 

Adonai, look my way

Don’t test my loyalty

Cover me with your grace

wrap me with your garments

I can’t promise to never veer

but each day I shall wait on You

And if I fall I will get up

and look your way

gather myself 

and walk toward You

I will call your name

Adonai 

Day Five Elul

Prompt : Want

Commit

                                                                  

                                                               To Commit

                                                                               I have found the one

                                                                            whom my soul loves——Song of  Solomon 3:4

                                                       I complete myself

                                                 My wild and adventuresome 

                                                 soulmate, my love

                                                                  ——Song of Solomon 3:4

Elul: Day Four

Prompt: Commit

Choose

What to read? 

Perhaps a Queer romance? Or

biblical commentary unveiling

truth as seen by the author

 or a memoir that upends a simple life—

writing of conflict and a sink

of dirty dishes, silverware 

with meal remnants, wine glasses

with a ring of residue

What to read ?

Shall I dip into a book outlining

forgiveness? A how-to for those

who need a road map.

and a reminder for others

What to read?

Day Four Elul

Prompt: Choose

When Stories Grow

Prepare Me

to look inside myself

before I tread beyond my marrow

Let me enter the place where my stories take root

Let me rub each word to erase any magnification

to cleanse away the dressing-up of truth

so the tale is not enlarged 

or clothed in new garments

only then I will look beyond myself 

Day 3 Three Elul

Prompt: Prepare

Finding the Holy Each Day

                                We have what we seek, it is there all the time, 

                                    and if we give it time, it will make itself known to us.—

                                        ——Thomas Merton

  

When dark settles between tree limbs

When sounds interrupt quiet

I wait

I wait to hear a voice break through—

shatter silence

I enter prayer, speak to one

 who hides His face

who  waits for me

to speak 

Hashem I say

Prompt Word: Seek

A Riff on Psalm 25

                                                                              I don’t want other people to decide who I am.

                                                                            I want to decide that for myself.——Emma Watson

So many ask why?

Why believe in one

whose face is hidden

beneath words

I chant Your praise,

off-key and with a stutter 

of Hebrew syllables 

You hear my soul song

My praise

I stand wrapped in a cocoon

of cloth offering praise

I am not ashamed

of my song

You uncover sounds

beneath the depth of

my words, filling spaces

I chant my praise

Let others

follow false idols

messiahs of wealth

I will praise You

without shame

Day 1 Elul

Prompt : Decide

GODTIME

 

                               So I call on your name

                               knowing you will answer

                                                       Fisher

GOD TIME

You

Me

We talk

First you

Then me

I ask you how you doing

And you tell me about how you got a traffic ticket

I ask if you can get it fixed

You answer about your uncle joe

who  knows someone 

in the precinct

near Katz’s delicatessen 

named  Bernie

He’s always got some cow blood

on his apron

I ask you

about your bunions 

and if you cut a hole in your sneaker like I told you’

it don’t hurt so much

You’re a mensch

Not like God

Too busy to answer when I ask

Four years ago I asked a Butch

For my  cousin’s daughter Zipporah

The one who has acne

Did God answer

Not yet

God takes Godtime

Could be years

until  God gets to your letter

Maybe God’s doing a needlepoint

for God’s favorite angel

A guy with a name twisted like a pretzel

You

Me

We know about time

 LIFE’S LIKE THE GRAND OLE’ OPERA

because my tulips dig their way 

out of winter’s hard packed snow

because every wave 

was born in the Arctic Ocean

because every artist feels colors 

i their souls

because this second is pushed

aside by another on its way

because loving like i was twenty

Linda Watskin                                  

May It Be So

 

                          

Psalm 15

I remember the friend who taught

small hands how to create cookies

with M&Ms eyes

one orange candy corn nose

a strip of red licorice 

with turned up ends

And the person on a subway train

who led a car filled with 

people hanging on straps

in a singing of popular songs

while the car stood at a stand still

in  a dark tunnel of tracks

Imagine if you and I

If all of us could step

beyond our own shadows

and walk toward light

sprinkling seeds

into a waiting soil                

I Will Wait andListen

Did You listen when I prayed

Did You hear my words 

Perhaps I asked in plain speech

and  You wanted sounds leavened 

with metaphors and tears

My heart carried plaintive sounds,

my words held fragments of a narrative 

My daughter, I said, stopped talking to me

when I spoke of loving a woman 

She left no space to speak

I prayed and asked for help—

Year after year I spoke and you remained

cloistered, silent and withdrawn

Were you testing my resolve

Now years beyond 

my first request

a doorway opened

and we shared words

—syllables exchanged between strangers

Now I pray for a bridge 

to span the divide

I will wait and listen

Two Sides to Words

 Psalm 12

Two Sides to Words

When lies intrude

displacing truths

with fabrications

a collision exists

between words 

that ferment unease 

and words that cross boundaries

to smooth rough places 

to offer hope 

When people speak with hollow words 

with words of derision

with words that spew unrest 

Adonai looks upon his gift 

of language—mangled, distorted 

by supple tongues and shorn of love 

and seeks those who use words 

to bless, to love 

to embrace

Wandering on a Möbius

 Psalm 11

G-d of many names

I called you Adonai

I called you Jesus

Today I call you Adonai

     and wrap myself

     in ancient words

You heard me

Watched while 

I pursued you

Walked with me

Sheltered me 

within your embrace

I heard others

snicker, paint me

chameleon 

Turn their cackle

into hollow moans

Force them to chew

their words

until spittle

garbles their speech

Restore their words

Winnowed

scrubbed and cleanest

with love